Oversharing...

 

I am often accused of over-sharing.  I won't say by whom, but it is Joan (oversharing).

Or, as our daughter says, "Just because you think it, it doesn't mean you have to say it."  Sounds like something a teacher would say.

So, what made you think of this oversharing topic, Jim?  Thank you for asking - I know I can count on you readers to keep the conversation moving.  This morning, as I was undressing to take a shower, I was wearing PJ bottoms.  Well, that isn't entirely accurate, as I don't wear pajamas.  (I feel some oversharing coming on).  I wear a t-shirt to bed.  But, I do generally put on some lounging pants when I get up.

Anyway, this morning, apparently those lounging pants were slipping off my waist and my underwear was showing (oversharing).  Joan asked me, "Are you trying to look like a rapper?"

"Yes, because that is what I do - I try to look like a rapper."  (that isn't oversharing - that is bullshit)

She asked, "What is your rapper name?"

There are websites to help you come up with your "rapper name"... they ask questions like: What is your favorite fruit?  What is your Mother's maiden name?  What street did you live on as a child?  What was your first pet's name?  What is your Social Security Number and bank PIN number?  I think this could be someone trying to "mine" your personal information.  That is not the kind of oversharing I do.

Back to the story: I said, "Dip Shiddy."  Apparently that wasn't an acceptable answer.  Apparently this is an important question/answer, in case I decide to break into the rap business.  Is it a business?  I based that on a rapper name I could remember: P Diddy.  I think that may have been 8 or 10 names ago for Sean (P Diddy, Puff Daddy, Puff, Puffy, Diddy, and others) Combes.  Do you think when he fills out a job or credit application he has to list all those names as aliases he has used?  I digress.  Apparently, I do that a lot.

So, Dip Shiddy doesn't cut it.  Maybe: LL J-Bat?  That has worked for LL Cool J... apparently the "LL" stands for "ladies love"... LBT J-Bat?  As in: Ladies Barely Tolerate J-Bat.  Who is J-Bat?  Duh, that's me: first initial of my first name, first three letters of my last name.  I came up with that on my own, after deciding to not give the Rap Name Generator website all my personal information.  I could go with just J-Bat, but Jennifer Lopez has kinda used that up.  Li'l J?  Like Lil Wayne, Lil Bow Wow, Lil Baby, Lil Jon, Lil Poopy.  Lil Poopy?  There's a rapper named Lil Poopy?  Apparently.  That definitely sounds like oversharing to me.

Just writing this, I'm over the whole rapper name thing.  Although there is probably an opening for an old white guy (oversharing) in the rapper scene... for sure it hasn't been overdone.  You have Vanilla Ice (old time) and Eminem... Rob Van Winkle was quick to get in on the "Ice" thing... Ice T, Ice Cube, Ice Billion Berg, and now Ice Spice.  Gray Ice?  It would probably be misappropriating something if I went with Black Ice, huh?  (moved from oversharing to completely inappropriate) 

Years ago, I knocked on our neighbor's door - I saw they had company with kids and a dog and I wanted to let them know that I had just sprayed weed killer on the paver bricks between our houses.  A young Hispanic girl answered the door and politely said, "Yeah?"

I asked, "Is Sandra here."  She and her husband own the property, but it was a weekend getaway place, not their main home.   (oversharing)

Someone in the house asked, "Who's at the door?"

The girl turned her head inside and said, "Some old white guy."  I was laughing too hard to be offended, I mean, it was an accurate description.

Some Old White Guy.  I think I may have found my rapper name.  I'm kidding... in spite of this being the 50th anniversary of "the birth of rap" (I saw that on some awards show), I never got into that.  If you're into rap, don't be offended.  I'm not into polka music, either, but apparently the Chicken Dance is still a thing.

Hmmm... chicken.  I could go for some Alice Springs Chicken from Outback.  That isn't oversharing, that is digressing once again.  Apparently I do that a lot.  Is that oversharing?