I don't know how much more I can take...

 

"Tired of being a trophy-husband, Jim?" you ask.  Thanks for asking, but no.

I will publicly admit: I like TV.  The networks, the streaming services, sit-coms, action shows, movies.  I find I watch the news less than I used to... because it is more about sensationalism than just presenting the facts.  I watch the Today Show in the morning.

But, the mid-term political season has been on-going, never-ending with the political ads.  And down here on the edge of the country, they are pure negative and intentionally misleading.  We have candidates saying, "I will not let my opponent stop me from lowering gas and grocery prices..."  Wait, what?  Someone running for the House of Representatives can single-handedly lower prices?  How is she going to do that?

Another saying, "My opponent accepts 'dirty money' from drug smugglers, human traffickers, and sexual predators..."  Her opponent is a defense attorney.  That's his job - defending bad guys.

Another saying, "Crime will rise if my opponent is elected.  Vote for me to defend you..."  What is she: Batgirl?

Another saying, "My opponent wants to eliminate the border wall and let everyone in who wants to come across the border..." One person can do that?

These are some of the outrageous accusations and promises, but certainly not the most vile.  "My opponent wants to have sexual relations with your dog, and if elected, will force everyone to have relations with dogs..."  Yes, I'm kidding.  I don't have a dog.  Yes, I have taken this to the absurd.  But, the onslaught of ads is daunting.  Although I am sure it is good for the advertising sales business.

"Just turn off your TV, Jim," you say.  But, I like my TV.  At this point, I'd even take the attorney and car dealer ads... which seem to have slacked off to make room for the political ads.  We have one attorney ad where he shoots lightning out of his hands... OMG, he's a freakin' superhero!  Or, maybe a mutant.  But he will "get me the money I deserve."  And if the car dealer ads were honest, they'd be saying, "We don't have many cars in stock, but we're going to gouge you on the ones we do have.  So bring in your trade and bend over!"  OK, maybe I'm not ready to see the car dealer and attorney ads again.

And, you can't get away from the ads by watching YouTube videos - seriously, a political ad before I can watch a motorcycle video??  And if I step outside my house and off our island, it reminds me of a song from the 70s: "Signs, signs, everywhere the signs, clogging up the scenery, breakin' my mind..."  The political signs are everywhere.  You can't get away from this crap.

Other than outrageous claims about "fixing inflation" and "securing our borders", most of the ads are negative.  "My opponent is a giant douchebag.  Only a douchebag would vote for him.  He will force us all to be douchebags.  Only I can save you from forced douchebagdom..."

I often have the TV on in the background, even if I'm reading.  I set the timer on the TV when I go to bed.  I find it soothing.  Except for during the political ad season.  Which seems to start right after whatever election we just had.  They are all douchebags.  And by "they," I mean the politicians and the people who write the political ads.  Just under two weeks to go, and I fully expect the TV stations to take off programing and just run political ads 24/7... all the ads, all the time.

I think I will be still be voting for "None of the Above."  Douchebags.